St. Augustine Lighthouse: The Mona Lisa of the Paranormal II

The Talking Mongoose and Madame Blahblatsky are recarping episode 219 of Ghost Hunters, the end product of which should have been the white crow of The Atlantic Paranormal Society.  Unless it was a black crow.  We don’t know.

TM:  It could be black and white.  Striped.

MB:  You’re just saying that to encourage me to go on.

We left Jason and Grant recovering at Mission Control after chasing a crow ghost up the stairs at the St. Augustine Lighthouse, or so we are to believe.  See Part I here.

st. augustine lh interior

Lovely photo courtesy of

Steve’s fear of heights is keeping him out of the lighthouse with its 140-foot high spiral staircase.  Brian and Dustin have been sent in.

Lighthouse Tower

2:02 AM

Brian: “Can you hear me?” He whispers: “Dude, it’s responding to us.”

Dustin interviews: “It started when Brian and I get to the landing, we started giving the hellos, and we’d actually get a response.”

Brian: “These kind of responses or something…”

Dustin: “It sounded like a whisper.”

Brian: “Helloo!”

MB: Eek! I heard a squeaky hello just now.

TM: Pft. That could be the sound guy.

MB: Don’t be such a spoilsport.

Brian whispers: “That was a definite female voice.”

Dustin: “Didn’t it sound like somebody said ‘help’?”

Brian interviews: “Every time that we’d say hello, you’d hear a woman’s voice going – some kind of moaning noise.”

Brian in scene yells upward: “Can you show yourself?”

Dustin: “We’re not here to scare you.”

The damn sound guy is adding mechanical whines.

MB: I wish he’d stop that.

TM: He would if there were anything else to hear.

MB: Even so. It’s annoying.

Brian: “We need to know where you are. We need to help you.”

Dustin: “Dude! Did you see that?”

Brian: “Move it move it go!”

The camera man stumbles around. General chaos ensues.

TM: This would be a perfect moment for Brian’s signature phrase.

Brian: “Somebody’s moving there.”

The Investigation

St. Augustine Lighthouse

Sunday, 2:36 AM

A repeat of the chaos, to make sure we know something significant is happening.

Dustin: “Dude! Did you see that?”

Brian: “We got somethin’ – go, go! Someone just moved. Go go go!”

They are crashing up the stairs, with the camera crashing around behind them.

Brian: “Helloo!”

Brian interviews: “Me and Dustin were investigating the lighthouse and we looked up and all you could see was totally dark up there, and then it got totally light like the shadow moved away from the area.”

Lighthouse Tower

8 hrs. into investigation

Dustin: (incomprehensible)

Brian: “Light just changed on the _”

Dustin: “Something just moved across that window up there.”

They are both peering upward intently.

Brian, whispering: “Didn’t it look like somebody grabbed the hand rail. Lookit.  At the top, it was like this.”

He demonstrates, by flashlight.

Brian interviews: “So I saw something I’d never seen before in my life. You could see something moving around on the top level. Then you see a hand grab the hand railing.”

Brian in scene, whispering: “It’s coming down. It’s coming.”

Dustin: “Are you freakin’ kiddin’ me?”

Brian, whispering: “Here it comes. Dude, it came down one floor. It’s two floors up now.”

There is a small ruckus.

Brian: “Oh! What the fuck was that? Did you see that? Holy fuckin’ shit! Dude, that was like a fuckin’ ball of light or something.”

The editors get busy here, bleeping Brian. In their captions, they declare that he said “bucket ball of light.”

Brian interviews: “We looked up again and there was a big ball of light flash. Poof.”

MB: God damn it. I didn’t see a thing. Did you?

TM: Nope. It was a lot of nothing. In the dark. Although I must say, Brian does seem exercised about something.

MB: But he’s an excitable guy. Still, he usually remembers to use “frig” and “frick.” He said “fuck” three times in a row there.

Brian in scene: “Dude, that was the most crazy shit I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Dustin: “I know. I still can’t believe it.” They are still whispering.

Dustin interviews: “It was like nothing else I’ve ever experienced before. It’s one of those things, it’s like if I weren’t there personally, I wouldn’t believe it myself.”

Brian interviews: “This is like the – the Mona Lisa of all paranormal activity that I’ve experienced with my own eyes. I can die a happy man now.”

MB: Ah. I do like Brian and his unbridled enthusiasm.   It’s the saving grace of this dreadful show.

TM: You’ll be interested to know he now refers to this as the Holy Grail of the paranormal.

MB: See, that’s what happens when you over-think  things.

TM:  Nude Descending a Staircase, No. 2 would have been more appropriate.  Or – Dude.

Brian in scene: “That was crazy.”

The guys retreat, downward.

Light Keeper’s House


2:42 AM

Jason and Grant are ambling about with the everlasting FLIR thermal imaging camera.

Grant: “So this is the room where the gentleman walks.”

Jason: “Yeah.”

Grant: “Like this.” He sweeps his arm out.

Jason: “Come out.”

Grant: “Come out, wherever you are. The room looks pretty much the same temperature wherever you go, denoting that (mumble). What the heck is that? Something went right in front of us.”

They replay the film segment on the camera monitor.

Jason: “Nope.”

Grant: “I guess I was wrong. I thought I saw like a head and shoulders go by, but it was something else. Either we’re jumpy tonight or I don’t know what’s going on.”

Jason: “Jumpy?”

MB: Yeah, speak for yourself, Ghant.

TM: I want it noted that Brian confirms the whole haunted house thing vs. the lighthouse pre-TAPS.  I quote: “Funny thing is, they didn’t want us to investigate the lighthouse. They said nothing ever happens in there.”

MB: They being?

TM: The lighthouse people, I assume. It was the gift shop that was supposed to be haunted.

MB:  Gift shops can’t be haunted.

TM:  That’s what Steve thinks.

MB:  Then I take it back.

Jason: “Just lettin’ the thermal do its thing.”

Grant: “Yeah.”

But the thermal’s “thing” is, as usual, nothing so Jason and Grant go find Steve and start to regale him with their adventures on high.

Jason: “So, Steve – me and Grant were in the lighthouse and all of a sudden we looked up and all you see is a black mass. It just – whomp.” He sweeps his hand up.

Light Keeper’s House

3:33 AM

Grant: “Dude, it rocketed off the landing.” He repeats Jason’s gesture.

Jason interviews: “We’re experiencing a lot of activity in the lighthouse and you know I want Steve to experience it as well, so we decide to try to get Steve to come with us in the lighthouse.”

Jason in scene: “But then, to top it all off, you hear ‘help me’ from a female.”

Steve interviews: “I didn’t really wanna investigate the tower of the – of the lighthouse. After I started hearing the first-hand experiences – uh – from J. and Grant, I really had to get in there and experience it for myself.”

Steve runs to the tower and charges through the door, holding a flashlight.

TM: Look at him go! Maybe you’re right about that acrophobia after all.

MB: Yeah, lickety-split. Just wait. It will come right back when it’s time to fetch the equipment.

Then Steve starts climbing those fearsome stairs.

Lighthouse Tower

9 hrs. into investigation

Steve interviews: “Climbing the lighthouse tower stairs in the dark is pretty difficult, especially with my fear of heights. It was really dark, I was alone, I just had a flashlight, um – it was disorienting at some points. It was really difficult to get up to the top but – uh – I didn’t want to be the only one that left there empty-handed without any personal experiences.”

In scene, he seems stalled on the stairs, whether by the ghost or the phobia is uncertain. Jason shows up behind him.

Jason: “What’s going on with these heights? You okay?”

Steve: “I can’t really see in the dark so it’s not so bad.”

MB: Now, see – I think the phobia should be worse in the dark if it’s real.

TM:  Yeah, I wouldn’t be closing my eyes around clowns.  That wouldn’t help at all.

Jason: “All right, good.”

Steve, loud: “Would you please give us sign to let us know you’re here with us?”

Jason, whispering: “Do you hear that?”

Steve: “I did hear footsteps. Did you hear those?”

Jason: “I heard that, too.”

They’re both looking up.

Jason: “Make yourself known.”

Steve: Can you give us a sign, please?” He whispers: “What’s that up there?”

Jason: “There’s something up there.”

The Investigation

St. Augustine Lighthouse

Sunday, 4:16 AM

Jason interviews: “Steve’s terrified of heights but the minute activity started picking up in the lighthouse he was more than willing to climb the stairs, ‘cause he need to investigate.”

TM: If I were Steve’s therapist, I’d lock him in a room for a while with no food, except for box of pizza on top of a really tall ladder.

MB: If I were Steve’s therapist I’d push him off a cliff.

TM: Mme!

MB: Well, with plenty of water underneath, of course.

TM: I think my system would work better.

The editors repeat the moment, after the invisible commercial.

Steve: “Can you show us a sign, please? What’s that up there?”

Jason: “There is something up there.”

Steve: “There it – it is.”

MB:  There is sort of a shadow.

TM:  Psh.  They’re making it up. I don’t see a thing.  They’re flashing their flashlights around making shadows.  They don’t want poor Steve to go home empty-handed, and Steve sure doesn’t want to, either.

Jason: “Yeah, on the next big landing – not this one but the next one.”

MB: How many stairs are there between the landings?

TM: I think it must vary, because – uh – let’s see. 219 steps divided into 8 flights is about 27. But the diameter of the spiral gets smaller at the top, which would mess up things up and all the landings are aligned. So I dunno. I can tell you the risers are about 7-5/8” high though!

Steve: “Yeah.”

They go up further. Grant has been trailing them.

Grant: “Can we get some footsteps – just walk a little?”

Steve: “Can you tell us your name?”

Jason, whispering: “Whaddaya think, Steve?”

Steve: “Maybe she’s done for the night. I definitely heard a few noises and I saw – I did see a shadow.”

TM: He doesn’t sound very certain.

MB: He wants to believe.

Steve interviews: “I was able to get all the way to the top of the lighthouse with the help of J. and Grant. My desire to experience the paranormal did overcome my fear of heights – uh – for that half hour or so.”

Steve in scene: “We’re gonna say bye now. It’s your last chance – say hello?”

TM:  Last chance?

MB:  As if.

Steve interviews: “I was able to have a few experiences myself. I heard footsteps – uh – coming up the lighthouse stairs and I was able to see the shadow that everybody was talking about – uh – so hopefully this’ll help me the next investigation we have that involves heights but I do wish that I’d been there with – uh – Brian and Dustin so I could experience the – uh – half-body apparition.”

MB: How do you suppose it’s going to help him the next time?

TM:  I bet he doesn’t go to IMAX movies, either.  Think of the horror of To Fly!

MB:  Hey, 3D can’t be too good either. Those dinosaur birds in Avatar.

TM:  He probably can’t even manage a Cinerama roller coaster.

Back at ground level –

Jason: “You know what? It’s that time so, let’s wrap it up.”

Brian is doing a good job of making Steve want to kill him.

Brian: “Dude, you’ll never ever experience what we experienced. I saw a bon? apparition now.” He demonstrates on stairs. “We saw this, [he puts his hand out on the stair rail] and we see a shadow moving back and forth like it was pacing. It was deciding whether or not to come down again.”

Steve smiles tightly. They are winding extension cords.

Brian: “I’m all set now, dude.”

Steve: “It’s not a full-body thing. Unless you’ve seen full body…”

Brian: “Doesn’t matter. I seen a hand and shoulders…”

TM: If he’d seen a full body, would it have been the Venus de Milo of the paranormal?

MB: Not if he saw a hand.

Brian slashes his hand across and clucks his tongue to emphasize his paranormal coup.

Brian: “And I was – the whole time I’m like – it figures the one time I see an apparition my boy is not with me.”

Steve mumbles resentful assent.

TM: His boy. I hope he isn’t walking down those stairs in front of his boy.

MB: Steve was his boy.

TM:  I’ll bet Steve would beg to differ.

Brian: “Jeez, I can’t win.”

MB: Aw. It’s nice of him to want to share. Ol’ Steve would never be that gracious.

TM:  He’s still mad about the hat.

They slam the doors on a van full of extension cords.

Dustin: “That’s it for now.”

Brian: “That’s it.”

We get a last look at the lighthouse for the night, with Brian, back to camera, staring at it.

Brian: “Damn.”

Jason and Grant are doing their bread-and-butter chat with their host.

Jason: “Well, Paul, we really wanna say thank you for having us out and it’s been wonderful.”

Paul: “It’s no problem.”

Jason: “And what we’re gonna do over the next couple of days is go over the evidence we gathered here, and we’re gonna give you a shout and come back, sit down with you and let you know what we found, what we didn’t find.”

Paul: “Sounds good.”

Jason: “You have a good night.”

TM: Isn’t it 5 in the morning?

Paul: “Yeah. You, too.”

Grant: “Get some sleep, all right?”

Paul: Yeah. You, too.

Grant: “Take it easy.”

Paul: “Thank you.”

Paul interviews: “It’s gonna be very interesting. The jury’s still out with me. If TAPS does find something I will definitely have to rethink my viewpoint on the paranormal.”

In the lead SUV, Grant is exulting.

Grant: “Dude, everybody experienced something.”

Dustin: “Yeah.”

Grant: “Just stare that friggin’ apparition right in the face as it looked down at us – ha ha ha – that was awesome.”

MB: Grant is such a bozo. I only hope when he’s dead and flailing around in some damp, miserable place, he gets hounded by ghost hunters who taunt him and cackle over his inefficacy.

TM:  And what would Grant be haunting?

MB:  Fort Delaware!

TM:  I vote for Race Rock.  Even damper and more miserable.

Jason: “I’m – ecstatic. I can’t wait to see what we’ve actually caught.”

The Analysis

St. Augustine Lighthouse

Tuesday, 7:17 AM

They are pretending Steve and Brian are doing the analysis back at the hotel. Dustin is missing.

Steve: For the lighthouse case, we had five different camera angles running, mini DVs, we had audio recorders everywhere, digital audio running – you know we’re pretty excited to watch this evidence because there’s a lot of first-hand experiences, a lot of stuff went down, and I hope that we’re able to validate some of our personal experiences with the evidence we find so that’s what we’re hoping for.”

There’s a camera shot from the bottom of the tower staircase, which is not the FLIR camera. Its date/time tag says it’s 01/14/06 23:55:42. This is, of course, a day before the FLIR screen we saw earlier. Interestingly, there is a split second of a shot of the 4-screen monitor, in which there is only the single camera at the bottom of the tower at 01/14/06 at 23:55:43. The other three cameras are in the house. A Pilgrim crew member seems to be filming Steve in the basement at the moment.

MB: They’re messing with us, again. As usual.

TM: Hmm. So they were actually filming on Saturday night before Grant and Jason were using the FLIR in there on Sunday night.

Steve: “Check this out.”

Brian, grinning: “No, check this out, man.”

Steve: “Wait. Wait wait wait. Check this out first. This is somebody what’s not accounted for, or (he points to a bright spot at the tippy top of the spiral staircase) some thing that’s not accounted for.”

A figure has appeared at the top, and seems to bend over the rail and straighten back up.  There are shoulders and a head visible.  It looks quite like a person.

Brian: “Whoa!

Steve: “See him come out?”

Brian: “Dude, that’s cool!”

Steve: “You see a little light but I don’t think that’s a flashlight because you would see the beam.”

Brian: “Yeah, you’d see the beam. It looks like someone going like this.” He bends over the edge of the desk.

TM:  But would you see the beam?

MB:  What do you mean?

TM:  We’re looking a a night-vision shot.  I don’t know how light beams register on an infrared spectrum.

MB:  But the motion detector hasn’t gone off!

TM: Stop wailing!  My ears.

Steve: “Which is exactly what J. and Grant said they saw.”

Brian: “Dude, that’s awesome.”

Steve: “So that’s…”

Brian: “That’s pretty good, really. You wanna see something else that’s amazing?” He is grinning broadly, and pokes Steve.

Steve: “Can’t top that.”

Brian, gleeful: “Oh –ha ha.” He singsongs: “I don’t know.”

MB: Brian is so happy! Look at that!

TM: It’s like watching puppies frolicking.  Or puppy with a bulldog.

Steve pooh-poohs: “Nothing could. Come on.”

Brian: “Okay, watch this, right here. On the stairwell right now see it moves over a little bit? And he’s not moving – and then poof – it’s gone.”

On screen is mostly blackness, with an unhelpful white oval drawn on by the editors to delineate more blackness.

Steve: “And that’s not a shadow because there’s no underlight coming up to you guys.”

Brian: “No! So when we were up there doin’ that it was on the stairs lookin’ at us.” He chortles. “Can you believe this?”

Steve: “Jeez.”

MB: He’s happy happy happy.

TM: It’s kind of heartbreaking.

MB: And then there’s Steve.

TM: Steve is not so frolicsome.

The Findings

St. Augustine Lighthouse

Wednesday, 5:30 PM

Jason and Grant pretend to visit the peons to inspect the fruits of their labors, although of course they already saw this stuff or they wouldn’t have been setting up the silly FLIR at the bottom of the stairs the day after the prize video was recorded.

Grant: Now that lighthouse was awesome so there better be some good stuff.”

Steve: “We didn’t catch anything with the thermal [Surprise!] but we did catch the ‘help me.’ Here we are.”

A clip of the production crew’s filming of Jason and Grant getting frantic in the tower is shown, which may be some sort of first. A very scratchy possible “help me” is heard, helped out a lot by a caption. Then there’s a second one, which is slightly clearer.

MB: They’re both clearer this time.

TM: Yeah. Wonder why.

MB: Oh, stop.

Steve: “And you hear it again.”

Grant: “One more time.”

Jason: “That’s awesome. That’s great. Did we catch any video of it?”

Steve: “Yeah.”

Brian: “Yes. This is – now we’re gonna show it. Watch this right here. Me and Dustin’s upstairs – we’re hearin’ the voices, seein’ the shadows. This is the next landing up, and that’s the stairs going up to the next landing. It’s right above us.”

We’re back at the clip of mostly blackness.

Jason, whispering: Oh, my god.”

Brian: “See – wait. See that?”

Grant: “Oh, yeah.”

Brian: “Watch, watch.”

Steve: “Now watch it take off.”

Brian: “It takes off to the right.”

There is more view of blackness, with some apparent movement in front of a light source, which must be a window.

Grant: “That’s like what I saw? That’s exactly what I saw?”

There is a general nodding of heads and verbal agreement.

Grant: “That’s when you were up there and…”

Jason: “That’s awesome.”

Grant: “And at the landing…”

Brian: “It was – it was pacing. That’s what we saw pacing.”

Grant: “That’s exactly what I saw.”

They’re all talking over each other, most excited.

Grant: “When I was like ‘J. – go up another level.” He’s squeaking.

Jason: “Look at how fast it moves, too.”

Grant: “That’s sweet.” He cackles.

Brian: “Now you’re not – you can now picture what we’re gonna see in this one.”

Grant is beside himself: “That – that’s awesome because that’s exactly what I saw.”

TM: Well, I suppose you could say that Grant is evincing genuine emotion here.

MB: Or…

TM: Or well-rehearsed emotion. Fake wolf!

MB: But then you’d be crediting him with being able to act.

TM: True, so that’s where it falls apart a little.

MB: Real wolf.

TM:  Nothing I’d bet real money on, though.

Steve: “This one – let me set this up for you. What you’re actually gonna see is a little disturbance here, and then something peek [sic] over the railing. See there?”

The clip from the night-vision camera at the bottom of the stairs is shown.

Grant: “Yeah.”

Steve: “And then…”

Grant: “Oh! Look at that!”

Jason: “Dude, that’s nuts.”

Steve: “There’s a – a trigger light when you go all the way up top so if it was a person, that light would have gone on. It doesn’t.”

Grant laughs.

Jason: “That’s awesome. That gives you chills right up the spine.”

Grant: “It does because that’s so perfect. That’s what we saw. That’s what I saw, that’s what we heard. Everything…”

TM: He is going on, isn’t he?

MB:  I view this as a good sign.

TM:  Overexcited weasels are never a good thing, though.

Jason: “Great job, guys.”

Steve: “And everything validates the experiences we had.”

Jason: “Well, make me a copy of that.”
Grant: “That’s awesome.”

Steve: “All right.”

Grant: “All right, guys. We’ll see you later.”

There is a farewell chorus of see-yous.

TM: You know what we don’t know?

MB: Probably not, by default.

TM: We don’t know when Brian and Dustin had their little encounter. There is no film footage with a time stamp on it. We also don’t know when the clip with Jason and Grant is from, although I’m betting on the 15th. But there’s no way of knowing how this all fits together as an investigation sequence. The only thing we know is when the “ghost” peered over the railing, Steve was in the basement of the house.

MB:  It might have been Brian.  It’s someone wearing a hat.  I can’t tell who it is.

TM:  Whatever.  They’re being awfully parsimonious with the details of how all this happened.  And if it’s the Mona Lisa of the paranormal, you’d think they wouldn’t need to be quite so circumspect.

MB:  It didn’t show up in Scientific American, did it?

TM:  I don’t think it even showed up in Fortean Times.

MB:  Ow.

The Reveal

St. Augustine Lighthouse

Wednesday, 6:45 PM

Jason and Grant stride out to their black SUV waiting poised in the hotel driveway – men on a mission.

Jason: “I am like ecstatic to do this reveal over there.”

Grant: “Yes. I can’t wait to talk to Paul and see what he thinks. I think he’s gonna blow his mind.”

Jason: “It was a lotta creepy things that happened over here.”

Grant: “Now see – we caught like good evidence but I mean rarely does it corroborate perfectly with what you experience.”

MB: Well, it doesn’t help when you’re faking things, Grant, you nitwit.  Although you’d think it would, if you were doing it correctly.

TM:  Like the DeVille Door?

Jason: “Kicked ass that night. Guess we made the right call by putting a camera in that lighthouse.”

TM: Oops.  I don’t think he’s supposed to imply they were considering not putting a camera in there.

MB: That silly FLIR.

TM: Yeah, that wasn’t the smoothest move ever.  They should have had Jason yelling at Brian about forgetting to put the DVR at the bottom, not the wireless audio at the top.

MB:  Whatever happened to that wireless audio, anyway?

TM:  Maybe the ghost turned it off.  Do you realize that two out of the three pieces of “evidence” are Pilgrim-recorded?

MB:  That must be a record of some sort.

Grant: “Yeah, should’ve put more.” He chortles.

Jason: “Yeah, well – I’m ecstatic. Let’s get over there.” He claps both hands, and looks over at Grant, while driving, in the dark. “Let’s talk to this guy.”

MB: For crying out loud, that’s the third time he’s used the word ecstatic in this episode, and it’s the third time he’s said it without a “c.”

TM: He thinks the word is asstatic. Same root as “asinine.”

Grant: “Yeah, let’s do it.”

Jason: “Hey, Paul. Good to see you again.

Paul: “You, too, Jason.

Grant: “How you been?”

Paul: “Good, good.”

Jason: “Anything strange happen since we’ve been here?”

Paul: “Not since you’ve been here, no. But I‘m interested in seeing what you guys found.”

Jason: “Well, you know what we did. We came here, we listened to the claims of activity that have gone on – um – everything from reports of voices…

Grant: “Yeah – um – the banging of a bucket in the lighthouse – uh – you name it, we tried to catch it all. We set up cameras, audio equipment – we carpeted the place.

MB: Carpeted. I didn’t see any carpeting.

TM: Brian did carry that wireless audio around a lot.

Grant: “One of the things we set about doing was trying to – uh – debunk that bucket in the lighthouse – that drop of the bucket, and we went in and as actually there was a window because of the wind was banging so we secured that window and we also – J. went down and dropped the bucket and we announced it – here’s what the bucket sounds like [crash]. Here’s what the window sounds like [similar crash].”

Jason: “’Cause we wanted to take the two sounds and you know – pretty much put ‘em together and hear how different they were.”

Grant: When it came to debunking, we thought maybe that window had slip [sic]open at times and people think they’re hearing the bucket drop ‘cause they sounded very similar. But we got three things that we wanna show you that we all experienced.”

Paul, who clearly has heard all about it already: “Yeah, I’d love to see it.”

Grant: “Okay. No further ado then.”

Paul: “Okay.”

Jason: “Yeah, me and Grant at this exact time had been chasing something up the stairs and trying to make contact.”

Film crew clip shown of Grant and Jason on stairs.

MB: So after they “carpeted” the place, the only thing they have to show for it is a Pilgrim film clip.

TM: I guess the haunted gift shop didn’t co-operate.

Grant: “Now listen close.”

Jason: “Here.” Grant points, to make sure Paul can’t miss it.

Jason: “Rewind it just a hair.”

Paul: “I thought I heard something.”

Grant: “Right after I say something, it’s there.”

Paul mumbles.

Jason: “No, upon checking it out what it appears to be is a woman saying ‘help me.’”

Paul: “Really?”

Jason: “For whatever reason we’re not sure why she’s asking for help.”

Grant: “Right here, give it another listen.”

Paul: “I feel like…”

Grant: “Right here.”

Jason: “That’s twice.”

Paul: “Twice. Wow.”

Jason: “That’s definitely – that’s a great piece of – you know – audio evidence because there were absolutely no females here. There’s no females from TAPS and you had no females here.”

MB: Females. Jason doesn’t think much of women, does he?

TM: They’re always trying to make him use proper grammar, and pronounce things correctly. Bitches.

Paul: “Yeah.”

Jason: “So.”

Paul: ‘Wow.”

Grant: “Let’s move on. So what you’re looking at here is the stairs going up and here are the landings all stacked.

Paul: “Okay.”

Grant: “Okay? Now you can see some light passing through the stairs.”

Paul: “Mm-hmm.”

Grant: “Okay? Just keep your eye on that.”

In the clip, Dustin is announcing that they’re not going to scare whomever it is they’re pursuing.

TM: I’d be calling for help pursued by TAPS guys, too.

Grant: “You can see something moving on it.”

Paul: “Yeah, I saw something there.”

Grant: “Hold on – it keeps…there it goes. Watch – it’s gonna blast off to the right.”

Paul: “Wow! Yeah, can I see that clip again?”

Jason: “Absolutely.”

Grant: “Of course. It’s like it stopped while they were talking and then continues.”

Paul: “There it is.”

Jason: “Yeah.”

Paul: “I can see it. [mumble] Wow. That sent a chill up my spine just now.”

Jason: “So there was something over them and – and it’s funny cause me and Grant were experiencing the same thing. It felt like something was toying with us.”

Paul: “Okay.”

Jason: “But now this next piece of evidence that we’re gonna show you – this is during the time that we were following something and it was like every time we went up the staircase, it would go up the staircase. Now me and Grant are right around here on the staircase

MB: They are not.

TM: Watch out, Paul! Jason’s pants are going to self-combust any second now.

Jason points to half-way up the stairs on the clip that was shot by the DVR camera on January 14.

Jason: “You’re gonna see something up here and you’re gonna see it move. And it’s going to go straight up to the very top in a very very short time.”

Grant: “Okay, you see this thing moving?”

Jason: “Now look – look at the very top.”

Paul: “Was that [laughs] just leaning over right there?”

Jason: “Watch. You’re gonna see it go up two flights of stairs in a matter of a couple seconds. Watch. Boop.”

Grant: “Look at that. Peeking right over at us. It gives me chills right now.”

MB: If it’s not peeking over the rail at Jason and Grant, what is it looking at?

TM: Us! I mean – the camera. Which…makes me a teeny bit suspicious.

MB: But I want this to be real. It’s creepy! It’s fabulous!

TM: It would be, if it were real.

Paul: “Wow. I wanna see that one more time.”

Jason: “Oh, absolutely. There it goes. It moves to the right.”

Paul: “Yep.”

Jason: “And that’s where it will disappear.”

Grant: “There it goes. Poof.”

Paul: “And then it’s gone.”

Jason: “It’s gone. Your motion sensor didn’t pick that up, so I think that that’s a very important thing that you need to understand when it comes down…”

Paul: “You’re sending chills down my spine.”

Grant cackles.

Jason, grinning: “I’m not trying to – I’m just telling you the facts what – you know – I mean…”

Paul: “You know I gotta go in that tower after you guys leave tonight.”

Jason: “I can honestly say – and I don’t say this much – that I do believe that lighthouse to be haunted.”

Grant: “A hundred percent.”

Paul: “Wow.”

Grant: “I mean…”

Paul: “Wow.”

Grant: “I mean this – you can’t ask for any better evidence in my mind what we’ve been through.”

Paul: “I will – I am a skeptic, and uh…”

Jason: “How do you feel now?

Paul: “I think you got me believing now. So how many spirits do you think are in there?”

MB:  How many? What else did we miss?

TM:  Hours and hours of pirates and jilted brides and Indian burial grounds, no doubt.  Thank god.

Jason: “Can’t tell you that. I can tell you that we caught one thing for sure.”

Grant: Now Paul. we don’t wanna just show you this and then say ‘bye’ and hightail it outta here.”

Paul: “Okay.”

Grant: “We wanna give you some advice and that is everyone who worked here has been comfortable here. There’s been stories but no one’s been hurt or harmed or anything like that so there’s no need to be afraid. I mean it is chilling but there’s no need to change behavior – uh – or to get panicked at all.”

Jason: “You ever need anything, just give us a shout.”

MB: That’s a big help.

TM: Selfless. Although it would be even more selfless if they offered Paul copies of the tape at cost to sell in the gift shop.

Paul: “Okay, I definitely will. I mean, thanks a lot.” He laughs.

Jason: “Appreciate it.”

There is the ritual departure shaking of the hands, probably for the third or fourth time.

Paul: “Thanks a lot.”

Paul interviews: “It’s one thing hearing them say they saw something but to actually see the video, it’s got my mind racing right now because that video is pretty conclusive proof that TAPS did catch something. I have to say that I’ve gone onto the other side, that I do believe that there’s something in that lighthouse so…”

Jason and Grant are exulting in the SUV.

Jason: “Well, man – that went awesome.”

Grant: “You had awesome evidence, you had a down-to-earth guy, who was blown away by what we found. I mean it’s…”

MB: I suppose we could say he’s thrilled because they actually caught something.

TM: Or he could be thrilled because he didn’t have to fake anything, or because he did have to fake something and it worked out really really well, or because somebody else had to do the faking and he doesn’t have to worry about it anymore or…

MB:  Enough.

TM:  Okay.

Jason: “Yeah.”

Grant: “Ten for ten.”

Jason: “We caught what people have been experiencing there and I think that that’s a huge thing. It helps bring credibility to them and – you know – to the field, of course, and solidifies everything that they’ve been saying.”

MB:  But I thought they caught what people hadn’t been experiencing there.

TM:  Yeah – you don’t want to think about that too long.  It’s like those Magic Eye pictures that make you go cross-eyed.

Grant: “It’s just too bad it’s so far away, man. I’d come back in a heartbeat.”

Jason: “Well, let’s definitely plan on coming back here in the future. And I gotta be honest, the team did really well that night. Brian, Steve and Dustin really did awesome.”

Grant: “They were on their game.”

Jason: “Well, you know what, man? Good job.” He holds his fist out for a fist bump, which is delayed due to Grant looking the other direction, mooning over their coup.

Jason: “On to the next one.”

Grant: “Yeah.”

TM: I dunno.

MB: What?

TM: The lighthouse people don’t think the lighthouse is very haunted before this. They’re pushing the house. TAPS sets up 3 cameras in the house, and one in the lighthouse. That camera captures one figure, or is it two? near the top of the lighthouse. We don’t get to see any footage before the Moment, so we have to take Steve’s word for it there’s nothing amiss before or after.

MB: Steve.

TM: We’re supposed to believe there’s a ghost leaning over the rail on the landing third from the top, which then whisks dramatically up to the top landing and peers over again. And there’s that light, which Steve and Brian are saying can’t be a flashlight because there’s no beam.

MB: Precisely.

TM: But what if a flashlight beam doesn’t register in the infrared light that the scene is shot it? I don’t know how infrared vision reacts to light sources.  But there could be two guys up there – one with a flashlight to disable to motion detector at the top, and one two landings below. And maybe it isn’t even TAPS. Maybe it’s Pilgrim, setting them up. It’s just a little too perfect.

MB: I’m going to start wailing. But what about Brian and Dustin seeing something on the stairs above them. That was filmed. Brian wouldn’t cheat.

TM: That’s a thin thread to hang on, but I’ll give you that. It seems like something did happen. But we don’t know what the timeline is. Assume Brian and Dustin had their experience first, which I’m betting they did. The lighthouse wasn’t supposed to be haunted, so Jason and Grant take the haunted house and send the flunkies to the tower. They get all excited when Brian and Dustin find something. Maybe Pilgrim decides to “enhance” the investigation after that, and upon seeing this, J. and Grant are convinced to pretend to act as if they were chasing the ghost at the time, hence the silly thermal set-up the next night.  They played that Mona Lisa clip of the thing leaning over the rail eight times.  Maybe it was nine.  Compare that to them showing Frank DeAngelis falling down twenty-one times, or the twenty-one runs of that ridiculous apparition at Eastern State Penitentiary.  Why did this get so little attention, hmm?

MB: But – but – but we heard the woman calling for help.  And I thought you thought the Eastern State apparition was “brilliant.”

TM: I was wrong.  And I’m not saying the lighthouse isn’t haunted. Although I still think it could be a combination of hoaxing by TAPS and Pilgrim. I’m just highly skeptical they filmed a real ghost peering over the railing. And again – why would a ghost peer over the railing? Remember, Jason and Grant are chasing the “ghost” up the tower to where the motion detector turns on the night after the film was actually made. So we have no idea if the motion detector was messed with on Saturday night. We just see it working on Sunday night.

MB: Why wouldn’t a ghost peer over a railing? You’re no fun at all.

TM: I just don’t want you pitching a fit if someone manages to prove it was all hooey. You got really ugly over Race Rock.

MB: Allow me a little bone here.

TM: Okay, TAPS has proof positive ghosts exist! They filmed a ghost peering over a stair railing at the St. Augustine Lighthouse. The perennial question of whether there is an afterlife has been solved, by fake plumbers from Warwick and their estimable t.v. crew.

MB: Jeezum crow. When you put it that way…

TM: Sorry.

MB: Cripes.   I guess it’s just as well.


Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 Responses to “St. Augustine Lighthouse: The Mona Lisa of the Paranormal II”

  1. Patrick Says:

    Thrilled to see new recarps. These are so much more entertaining than the actual show! It’s refreshing to see a creative, intelligently written, grammatically correct blog out there. Keep it up as long as you can stand watching. I’ve tapped out quite a long while ago.

  2. thetalkingmongoose Says:

    Thank you, kind sir. We shall try to struggle on, plumbing the murky depths, for the likes of you.

  3. MaryKT Says:

    Yay! I LOVE your blog. Keep up the great work! You ladies are awesome!

  4. thetalkingmongoose Says:

    LADIES??? We’re no ladies! Okay, well, maybe on a good day Mme. B. is. I am simply an irascible elemental, apparently. But we thank you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: